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antman

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966 Posts
Member #: 358
Post Whore

Snetterton, Norfolk

Not quite good enough at driving?

Are other boys faster than you in the wet?

Then you need: Ferrari international Assistance (FiA). This exclusive Ferrari only membership club has many benefits. Including: Anti overtaking assurance. Been overtaken? Feel a bit silly? Don't worry, we'll rule out the other party , even if it's embarrassingly obvious that they're faster than you? Can't drive in the wet? Can't cope with a little rain, don't worry. We'll ensure that the other party will lose their position ahead of you, ready for your mediocre inconsistent performance to keep you in the championship. Exclusive access to a secret 'second lane' in the pits. Just to make things a little bit easier we've arranged a private second lane , just for you. Overtaken a car by cutting a chicane and NOT giving back your place. Exclusive offer for Ferrari drivers - you can decide not to give back the position and we won't penalise you for it, just like in Hungary 2006? Guaranteed world championship.

Had a crash? Need to win the world championship? Don't worry just limp across the track and take off your nearest championship title contender - we'll do the rest?

A bit strapped? Need extra cash?>> Simply get one of your team to tell someone else how you>> make your cars and then we'll make sure they take the>> rap. Bits falling off your car? Looking a bit dangerous? At Ferrari International Assistance we operate a 'blind eye' policy just for Ferrari drivers. Been a bit silly? Taken off another driver whilst following the safety car? It's ok, as long as you didn't hurt yourself. I mean, who are Force India anyway? And how dare they be in front of you?

A bit bored? Want some extra action? With FIA plus you can take part in a number of 'additional membership activities'. Want to run some illegal aerodynamics? No problem, as long as the car is Red, you can have flexing wings, or oversized barge boards anything you like!? Has your rival come up with a great idea, before you? One quick telephone call on our free 0800 number and we'll make sure it gets banned overnight. No questions asked.

Not sure when you might need us next? Relax. Check out our track record. We're confident that we'll be able to make something up on the spot that will get you out of any pickle that you might find yourself in. For an immediate response you can call our number free of charge. Our Call centre Staff, Bernard, Max and Charles, are waiting for your call.

Ferrari international Assistance - Making it up as we go along for over 100 years


James_H

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3692 Posts
Member #: 1833
Formally mini_majic

Auckland, New Zealand

LMAO!!! THAT IS QUALITY!!!!


gr4h4m

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4890 Posts
Member #: 1775
Post Whore

Chester

funny because its true

I run a supercharger and I don't care the TB is on the wrong side.
VEMS + 12 PSI + Liquid Intercooler = Small Bore FUN!


Rob H

4314 Posts
Member #: 700
Formerly British Open Classic

The West Country

Fantastic

Isambard Kingdom Brunel said:
Nothing is impossible if you are an Engineer


antman

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966 Posts
Member #: 358
Post Whore

Snetterton, Norfolk

The email i got that in had made a big round of the motorsport world. Such names as Jo Ramirez, Mark Webber, Rupert Keegan and Mike Wilds. Its soo funny but true.


rubicon

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3756 Posts
Member #: 1709
I like granny porn.

LONDONSHIRE

awsome

On 2nd Oct, 2009 Vegard said:


On 1st Oct, 2009 Jimster said:
I bet my first wank came quicker than your first mini turbo


These new modern turbos with their quick spool up time, would make the competition harder.


On 15th Aug, 2011 robert said:
phew!!! thank you brett for smashing in my back doors .( not something i imagined writing... EVER)


joeybaby83

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6274 Posts
Member #: 509
Post Whore

Isle of Man

i always wondered what it stood for

"Turbo's make torque, and torque makes fun"

"did you know you can toast potato waffles?"



MikeRace

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6549 Posts
Member #: 1149
#1 Basshunter Fan

Force Racing ICT Dept Manager Miglia Turbo Am frum Yokshyer tha noes!

Email to FIA!!

1/4 Mile 14.3secs 96Mph Terminal 10psi of boost.


Fibreglass Parts? - http://www.tdkracing.co.uk/
Split Rims? - http://www.force-racing.co.uk/

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